day twenty-three

surprised by peace. i felt an incredible amount of peace in my spirit today. and not just my spirit, but in life around me. my work day was productive and lacked any sense of urgency (which is not always the case). my time with my children was smooth, interactive, enjoyable, and fulfilling (again, which is not always the case). and the rest of my evening turned out to be very pleasant and spiritually rewarding. here’s a taste . . .

upon returning from my routine of dropping the kids at home on tuesday evenings, i decided to light the candles, power up the stereo, and catch up on a bit of reading for a small group that i’m involved with. i cued up charlie parker and plopped myself on the couch – books in hand. there were two selected chapters from two different books that i was going to tackle. the first discussed the idea of living out of the center (meaning that as christians, our lives should revolve entirely around the person of jesus) and the second discussed the idea of confessing our sins (as christians) to the world. both provided words and phrases that seemed to jump off the pages. some found their way to my head and others found their way to my heart. but there was also a sense of peace that began to permeate my very being. i don’t know that i can attribute this peace to the content of the reading material, but i could feel myself submitting to this idea of trusting god in absolutely everything – understanding that he was, is, and will be in control of every situation in my life. and all that it requires is that i invite him in – into every failure, every success, every truth, every doubt, every struggle, etcetera, etcetera. and then the simplicity of this whole thing became aware to me – my peace was a direct result of my trust. the concept wasn’t really a surprise, but the feeling was.

it’s one thing to know something and entirely another to actually feel it – working itself out in you. well, tonight i felt it and it felt pretty good. thank god that these surprises are more than just visual representations of his majesty, but that they are also internal stirrings that can be felt within.